


It's Always You

by orphan_account



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Ableism, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Bisexual Alexander Hamilton, F/M, Fluff, Gay John Laurens, Gen, Hercules Mulligan deserves to be a flower girl, Human Disaster Alexander Hamilton, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Internalized Homophobia, Jealous John, M/M, Nonbinary Marquis de Lafayette, Pansexual Marquis de Lafayette, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-22
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-09-23 23:31:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17089805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: "John Laurens leaned his head back against the leather seat, exhausted from a long day. But soon it would all be worth it- he was going away to college in New York City, where he’d finally be away from his father. Henry was sitting next to him in the cab, knuckles clenched tight around John’s bag. His knuckles were always clenched tightly around something.///Grabbing his bag, Alexander Hamilton hurried off the crowded bus and onto the street. He walked briskly down the sidewalk until he reached the building with the address that matched the one he’d scrawled across the back of his hand that morning and followed his directions- also written on his hand- up to his apartment. It was bound to be small and dingy, as it was partially paid for by the full scholarship he’d managed to get to Kings College, but hopefully no worse than any of his previous living conditions on Nevis or in foster care."Or, Alex and John are roomies with Lafayette and Hercules in a modern-day college AU (because we know there aren't enough of those). LAMS slow-ish burn, a teensy hint of Laf/Herc if you squint really hard. It's cute, I promise. This is a terrible summary but you should give it a read anyway. ;)





	1. Escape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John Laurens arrives in New York City and meets his new roomies.

///

John Laurens leaned his head back against the leather seat, exhausted from a long day. But soon it would all be worth it- he was going away to college in New York City, where he’d finally be away from his father. Henry was sitting next to him in the cab, knuckles clenched tight around John’s bag. His knuckles were always clenched tightly around something.

John watched the people on the side of the street. They were all moving quickly, earbuds in, scarves and hats pulled over faces against the gusty wind- some biking, some walking, some out for a run in the chilly weather. It was the last day of August and autumn was beginning to set in. He wondered if these people would all keep walking when winter came and the cold was unrelenting and cruel.

That’s what John always imagined winter up north to be like, anyway. He’d never actually been north for their snowy season, so he was just guessing. But he’d experience one soon enough. 

He was excited- ridiculously excited, actually. Only a few more hours of dealing with his father, and then he was free for months! He’d even gotten an apartment with other students at King's College, partly paid for by his scholarship. He’d hopefully make some friends and fit in here- he didn’t want to be the weird southern rich kid.

Not that being rich was important to him- that was his father. John prided himself on being the least like him as was possible. Although that was easier said than done, as Henry was strict in the upbringing of his children, especially John. Clothes, shoes, classes, friends- all were chosen by Henry.

Until a few months ago. When John had told his father two things: one, that he wasn’t majoring in business like Henry wanted- he was majoring in biology instead- and two, he was gay and in a relationship. That conversation had ended in John getting kicked out of the house. He’d had no contact with Henry since, living with his boyfriend until that had fallen apart. Then he’d lived on the streets, coming home every once in awhile while Henry was out to check on his five younger siblings.

Then, a few days ago, Henry had called at John's friend's house where he was staying, saying he wanted to come with him to New York, help him get settled into his apartment. John had refused, but Henry had a way of getting what he wanted.

“Son,” said Henry suddenly, startling John out of his thoughts. “We’re almost there. We need to talk before you get into your apartment.”

“Okay,” said John warily. He knew where this was going.

“Remember what I always tell you. Listen to the Bible, no drinking except on Sundays for mass, no sex, and be careful who you make friends with. I don’t want to hear any more stories about my son and someone… who isn’t like us.”

“Of course, Father,” John said flatly. ‘Isn’t like us.’ So basically, everyone on campus except the racist, sexist, homophobic people. How John’s black mother had managed to tolerate a relationship with Henry for so long, John didn’t know. But it wasn’t like Henry had to know everything that went on in John’s life- he could get away with hanging out with nice people for once. That is, unless Henry scared them off first.

“I also plan on meeting your friends and your girlfriend next time I visit.”

“I told you I don’t like girls, Father. If that’s what you’re expecting you’re going to be disappointed.” Henry steadfastly ignored him. John sighed in defeat, playing with the strings of his sweatshirt. “And when might that visit be?”

“Watch your tone,” snapped Henry. John shrunk away from him- he knew that voice. “And I’ll probably be coming up again during winter break. I expect you to stay at college during that time- you’ll have work to do if you want to keep your excellent grades, and even more so if you’re going to major in business like we discussed.” His tone had gotten a bit threatening, a bit dangerous- a reminder of the argument they’d had on this subject, and a reminder of who he thought had won that argument.

John was most definitely not going to major in business, no matter what his father expected. “Of course.”

“Good. We’re here.” The cab pulled into a huge parking lot and John got out immediately, grabbing his bags.

They walked into the apartment, following the directions Henry had gotten, and finally stopped outside John’s place. John knocked and opened the door, immediately wincing- not at the sight itself, but at how his father was going to react.

Two black boys sat on a ragged couch at the side of the sparse living room, one with his frizzy hair pulled back into a ponytail, and one with a bandana tied around his. Both were grinning at John widely. But what made John wince was their t-shirts- the one with the bandana had on a Black Lives Matter shirt and the other had a rainbow logo on it.

John personally had no problem with either of the shirts- he quietly supported Black Lives Matter and gay rights- but Henry most certainly did. He walked into the room and his eyes narrowed at the boys, who’d stood up to greet John. Setting down John’s bags, he scowled at the outstretched hands they offered and crossed his arms over his chest.

With an apologetic glance at both boys, who looked offended, he shook their hands. “I’m John Laurens, pleased to meet you. This is my father Henry.” Henry nodded brusquely.

“Um… hey, John, nice to meet you too,” said the boy in the Black Lives Matter shirt. “I’m Hercules Mulligan, but call me Herc.”

“Bonjour, I’m Marie-Joseph Paul Yves Roch Gilbert du Montier de Lafayette, Marquis de Lafayette,” said the one in the pride shirt. Looking closer, John noticed that he had an eyebrow ring and was wearing soft pink eyeshadow and eyeliner. Smiling at John’s incredulous look, he added, “But I go by Lafayette. Or Laf.”

John laughed. “Nice to meet you, Lafayette, Hercules.”

Meanwhile, Henry’s face had gotten redder and redder each name Laf had said, and John didn't suppose the makeup helped either. “I’d like to speak to my son alone, boys. If you would…” he stared pointedly at the door leading to what John guessed was a bedroom. Herc and Lafayette left, exchanging annoyed glances.

As soon as they left, Henry turned his glare to his son. John took a step back, wincing at his father’s murderous stare.  
“I’m getting your room switched as soon as possible. These… boys are not people I want you hanging around with.”

“Calm down, Father, they seem really nice-”

“Oh, they might seem nice now, but mark my words, John, they’re not going to turn out well.”

“Well, frankly, you didn’t treat them with any respect whatsoever, so it might not be them that’s the problem here,” snapped John. He was tired of this bullshit. “You could at least try to be polite. Plus, this is my scholarship and my life. You kicked me out, remember?” he added, lowering his voice but keeping the anger.  
Henry’s face twisted with rage and he glanced around before swiftly stepping forward and backhanding John across one cheek. John inhaled sharply and stumbled back, barely managing to keep from yelping in surprise. 

“You’re lucky that’s all you’re getting, son,” hissed Henry. “Don’t ever talk to me that way again. I’m leaving. Don’t forget what we talked about.” Henry spun on one heel and stalked out of the room, slamming the door on his way out.

As soon as he was gone, John slumped onto the couch, touching his cheek gently. It burned- Henry had left a mark, which was unlike him in public.  
Lafayette poked his head out of the bedroom door and glanced around, then stepped outside. “The coast is clear, mon ami,” he called over his shoulder. Hercules followed him out and they both gave John appraising looks, like he was about to go all high and mighty on them.

“I’m sorry about my father,” John sighed. “He’s a jerk sometimes. Well, all the time, actually.”

Herc gave a nervous laugh. “Seems like that. No offense.”

“Nah, it’s alright. I hate him.” John stood and grinned at his new roommates. “I’m not like him.”

“That is good news,” said Laf. “We are expecting our other roommate tomorrow morning around ten, so make sure you are awake.”

“Don’t worry, I’m used to getting up early. Ten’s not a problem.”

“Mon ami, there is something on your cheek,” sad Laf, coming closer to inspect it. John leapt backward and slapped a hand over the mark, ignoring the sting. Lafayette’s eyes  
narrowed, then widened.

Great. He’d been too obvious, as usual. “Um, it’s nothing,” stammered John. “Is there an open bed where I can set up?”

“Yeah,” said Hercules, halting his examination of John’s face. He led John into a bedroom and pointed at an empty bunk bed. “You can choose, top or bottom. Our other roomie gets last choice.” Hercules smirked. “Unlucky for him. Laf and I are in the other bedroom next door.”

John dumped his bags on the bottom bunk. He took his time making his bed and putting his clothes in his designated drawer, hoping his bruise would fade by the time he returned to the living room. When he slipped back into the living area, his roommates were sitting again on the couch side by side, whispering quietly. John cleared his throat awkwardly and sat in a wooden chair at the small table.

“Hey, man,” said Hercules easily, no trace of embarrassment about the whispering in his voice. John wished he could be that easygoing.

Noticing Laf’s suspicious look, he quickly said, “Look, I really am sorry about how Henry acted. He’s a self-righteous asshole.” Then he winced- had he really just called his father an asshole? It was true, but… he’d never said something like that aloud before.

Lafayette shook his head. “We appreciate that, but that is not what I was looking at you for. I was saying how you still have a bruise on your cheek.”

John’s eyes widened. “Oh. Um, I… I tripped on the way out the door this morning.”

Herc narrowed his eyes. “We know that’s not true. It looks like a hand. Anyway, you’re here now, you’re away from him. You don’t have to deal with that shit anymore. I’m sorry you went through it in the first place.” There was a look of intense disgust on his face, but John knew it wasn’t directed at him.

“Oui, il est très horrible,” said Laf with distaste. “You deserve better.”

“Merci,” said John with a grin, relieved they didn’t expect him to act the same as Henry. “Tu est gentil.”

“Tu parle français?” exclaimed Laf with delight.

“Not really,” laughed John. “Just a few phrases here and there.”

“Well, I certainly don’t speak French, so let’s stick with English,” said Herc, wiggling his eyebrows. “D’accord?”

“I thought you didn’t speak French,” said John.

“Laf says it all the time. I’m not completely oblivious, you know,” said Hercules with a mock scowl. "I've picked some things up."

“Oui, not completely,” agreed Laf. “Juste un petit peu.”

John laughed again at Herc’s confused expression. “Yes, just a little bit oblivious.”

“Hey!” protested Herc.

“Come, sit with us,” invited Lafayette. “We will watch le télé.”

“You can just say ‘we’re watching TV',” said Herc.

“Oui, I could do that, but French is much more fun,” said Laf, patting the couch beside him in invitation.

John smiled and sat next to Lafayette as Herc turned on the tiny, outdated television. Since all four roommates had gotten this room partly paid for by their scholarships, the decor was abysmal, although easy to afford, so John wasn’t complaining.

///

After a couple hours of getting to know each other over old "Friends" reruns, Laf stood up and stretched.

“I am going to bed,” he said, glancing at the clock on the wall over the couch. It was only nine at night. “Do not forget our roommate is coming in the morning. I will make breakfast.”

“Laf is a great cook,” said Hercules with a grin. “Their pancakes are to die for.”

“Excellent,” said John. Homemade pancakes sounded delicious. Then he cocked his head. "Their?"

"Oh," said Laf, his cheeks flushing. "I go by they/them pronouns. My gender is, ah, what do Americans call it... nonbinary. I hope it does not bother you."

Herc gave John a look that said if it did bother him, he'd find himself dead in a ditch somewhere. John shook his head. He was faintly surprised, and a bit uncomfortable, but he'd get over it. He'd felt the same way about himself when he'd realized he was gay, but he'd learned to accept himself, and he'd do the same for his roommate. There was always his father's voice in the back of his head, feeding him lies, but John did his best to ignore it. "Of course not. Although... I don't really know anything about that kind of thing. If I ever say or do anything offensive, please let me know. I'm rather uneducated in this area."

Lafayette smiled brightly, flashing his- their- dimples. "Most people are. It is alright, I will let you know."

“When did you two get here?” John asked, glancing between them. "It feels like you've known each other forever."

“Yesterday afternoon. That is when we met,” replied Laf. “And I made pancakes this morning, Herc. We have leftovers. I am not making more food so early.”

“Leftovers aren’t as good,” complained Herc. “Fresh is always better.”

“You will get used to it. We will live off noodles soon,” said Laf matter-of-factly, shaking their head in exasperation. “The instant ones that taste like cardboard.”

“Ramen noodles?” asked Herc with a smirk. “They taste like heaven.” John nodded frantically.

“Americans,” grumbled Lafayette as they disappeared into the bedroom. “No sense of taste.” Herc and John laughed and followed them.

As John lay in bed that night, he smiled up at the empty top bunk. There was no way he was letting Henry switch his room. John was already disowned- what more would Henry do, really? Lafayette and Hercules were the best roommates he could have hoped for. Even if his third roomie turned out awful, he’d still enjoy his time here immensely, even if he had to live off ramen noodles for the rest of college.

Besides, ramen wasn't even bad, no matter how much Laf complained it tasted of cardboard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, hope you enjoyed this first chapter! More to come soon. This fic is mostly prewritten, but I still have some tweaking to do, which means I'd love to hear feedback and constructive criticism in the comments. This is my first posted fic ever, so bear with me... if I'm doing a terrible job, please let me know. If you're bothering to read this, it must be somewhat alright, so thank you ;). Next chapter posted in a couple days, I'm nearly done editing it.


	2. New Beginnings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alexander arrives in New York City ready for a fresh start.

Alexander Hamilton woke with a start to the sound of the intercom crackling on the bus he was riding- it was his stop. He peeled his forehead off the faux leather seat in front of him and stuffed his laptop into his bag with a sigh. He’d fallen asleep while working again.

Grabbing his bag, he hurried off the crowded bus and onto the street. He walked briskly down the sidewalk until he reached the building with the address that matched the one he’d scrawled across the back of his hand that morning and followed his directions- also written on his hand- up to his apartment. It was bound to be small and dingy, as it was partially paid for by the full scholarship he’d managed to get to King’s College, but hopefully no worse than any of his previous living conditions on Nevis or in foster care.

On his way up, he stopped in a public restroom to freshen up. Upon seeing his reflection in the mirror, he winced- his face was a bit gaunt and pale and he had dark bruises under his eyes, and his baggy sweatshirt didn’t do much to hide his thin frame. He pulled his shoulder-length, dark hair into a messy bun and grabbed the container of concealer from his bag, dabbing it under his eyes. There, he looked more presentable now he didn’t resemble a sleep-deprived zombie.

He walked to his room and knocked thrice before opening the door cautiously and stepping inside, closing it behind him gently. When he turned back, his three roommates were staring at him from the ragged couch across from an old TV: two black guys, one with a ponytail and the beginnings of a scrappy beard, the other extremely buff with a bandana around his forehead and a small grin on his face. That made Alexander a bit nervous.

The third boy was mixed, with millions of freckles dotting his face, shoulders, and bare arms. Soft brown curls framed his cheeks. He was incredibly cute, and staring at Alex with a wide-eyed, open-mouthed expression as a red flush crept over his cheeks.

“Um, hi,” he said nervously, clutching his bag a bit tighter. The third boy’s flush deepened. “I’m Alexander Hamilton.”

The room was silent for a moment. Then the boy with the scrappy beard grinned widely, leapt across the room to stand in front of Alexander, and stuck out his hand. “Je m’appelle Marie-Joseph Paul Yves Roch-”

“Laf, stop,” interjected the boy with the bandana, getting to his feet as well. “You’ll scare him away. Alexander, this is Lafayette. His real name is incredibly long and hard to pronounce and he also speaks in French half the time, so you can call him Laf and ignore him if he gets too annoying. I’m Hercules Mulligan- or Herc, whichever you prefer. And this is John Laurens,” he finished, gesturing to the cute freckled boy.

John Laurens grinned at him, confident despite the red on his cheeks. His smile was as beautiful as his many freckles. “Welcome to the mansion, Alexander. I’m from South Carolina, got here yesterday.” He strode over and leaned against the countertop in the adjoining mini kitchen, crossing his arms at his chest. Not much for a physical contact guy, Alex thought, but he didn’t mind. He wasn’t big on physical contact himself.

“You can call me Alex,” he said, offering a small smile in return. John’s grin was contagious. Even if he had been offended by John’s physical detachment, that grin would have made up for it. “And thanks.” He noticed Laf’s hand was still outstretched and shook it quickly.

“I’m from the city,” said Hercules, getting to his feet and coming over to grasp Alex’s hand as well. His large palm was calloused and rough, but his grip was gentle. “Lived here my whole life.”

“And I’m from France,” said Lafayette with relish. “I moved to America a few years ago.”

Alexander nodded. “I came to America when I was fifteen, from the West Indies.”

“Cool,” said John. “You have family here?”

“No,” said Alex coolly. He didn’t like talking about his past. “Where can I put my stuff?”

“In that bedroom,” said Herc, pointing at a door across the room. “Do you need help carrying the rest of it up?”

“Um, no. This is it.” Alexander gestured to his backpack, blushing.

“Oh,” said Hercules, looking embarrassed.

“There are two bedrooms, right?” asked Alex, quickly changing the subject.

“Oui,” said Laf. “I am with Herc, which is unfortunate since he has no inclination to clean up after himself-” he pointed to Hercules, who raised an eyebrow, “-and you are with John.” 

ALexander’s heart jumped. He was rooming with John- cute, freckled John! Then Alex’s excitement crashed down- he was sharing a room with John. What if he got one of his nightmares and couldn’t keep quiet? John would think he was nuts. He at least hoped he’d get the bottom bunk.

Alexander walked into the bedroom and sighed- top bunk. He’d just have to be extra careful not to wake John when he climbed down the ladder.

“Is something wrong?”

Alex jumped and glanced behind him- John had followed him inside, his cheeks still slightly pink. “If you want bottom bunk, we can switch,” John offered. “I don’t care.”

“No, it’s fine, I just… I get up during the night sometimes,” said Alex, twisting the drawstring of his hoodie in his fingertips. “I don’t want to wake you.”

“That’s considerate of you, but you probably won’t. I’m used to rooming with my brother. I’ll move my stuff if it makes you more comfortable, though.” John began stripping the bed and Alex hastily bent over to help him. His blanket had little cartoon turtles printed all over it, which Alex thought was endearing, if not a bit strange.

“Thanks,” said Alex once they’d finished. “You’re sure you don’t mind?”

“Of course not.” John winked at him and left the room, calling over his shoulder, “Come into the kitchen! Have you had breakfast?”

Alexander followed him and at once the delicious aroma of pancakes hit him like a truck. His stomach growled loudly and John looked over his shoulder and laughed. His laugh sounded like rushing water, cascading over rocks on a streambed.

“Guess that’s a no. Here.” John slid a plate of steaming pancakes in front of him, fresh out of the dingy microwave, and Alex sat down, picking up a fork.

“You’ve all eaten already?” He didn’t want them to have less because of him. He knew well how that turned out in his previous accommodations.

“Yeah, Laf made these about a half hour ago. Naturally, there weren’t many left, but we saved some for you.”

Alex immediately felt guilty. “If you or someone else needs more, I’m not that hungry-”

“Oh, please. I heard your stomach. Go ahead, Laf didn’t poison them or anything.” He offered that bright, crooked smile again. Alexander’s stomach fluttered. He obediently pulled the plate towards him and took a bite.

It was the most amazing meal he’d ever had. He scarfed the cakes down, trying to eat slowly so John wouldn’t get suspicious- Herc and Laf were still in the other room- but he wasn’t very successful. He was ravenous, probably because he hadn’t eaten more than a granola bar in the past couple days.

John watched him curiously, then swept away his plate when he was finished. “You want something else? We don’t have much, but Lafayette also bought frozen fruit. I have no clue what that’s for, but he- I mean they- said the fruit's for everyone.”

"They?" asked Alexander, raising an eyebrow. "Is Lafayette nonbinary or something?"

John nodded. "I think that's what they said, yeah. So Laf uses they and them as pronouns."

"Got it. Thanks for letting me know."

“Don’t you dare touch my frozen fruit!” yelled Laf from next door. “That is for smoothies, not plain! Give him the cardboard noodles!”

John chuckled and Alex felt a little grin creeping over his face. “Ramen,” said John, shaking his head in mock exasperation. “They’re called ramen noodles.”

Alexander smiled wider and stood up. “Thanks for making pancakes, Laf,” he called. “They were delicious.”

“My food is always delicious,” said Laf, but Alex could hear a pleased note in their voice.

“If you’re hungry, you can rummage around the kitchen. I’m sure there’s something other than Laf’s fruit,” said John. 

Alex shook his head. “I’m fine, thanks. Besides, I’ve got some work to do.”

“Work?” asked John bemusedly. “School doesn’t start till tomorrow.” Then an alarmed expression crossed his face. “Oh, shit. Has it started?”

“No, no. Don’t worry.” Alexander waved him off. “It’s personal work.” He grabbed his laptop from the bedroom and sat at the tiny wooden table in the living room, opening it and starting work on his essay about politics. He grew so lost in his work that he didn’t notice Hercules and Lafayette exchanging concerned glances or John’s furrowed brows as he ran his eyes over his thin, haggard appearance. The hours slipped away and it was dark before Alex knew it.

He didn’t look up until someone tapped him on the shoulder, startling him out of his reverie. He slammed his computer closed and scrambled out of the chair, making it halfway across the room before he realized it was only Hercules.

Alexander picked up his laptop and slipped it under his arm, flushing from embarrassment. His heart pumped loudly in his ears. It was hard for him to suppress the instinct, ingrained after years in the crappy American foster system, that when someone touched him it meant pain was coming.

“You okay, man?” asked Hercules, knitting his eyebrows together anxiously. Lafayette was staring at him from his bedroom door and John was watching warily from the couch. 

“Yeah, sorry.” He forced a laugh, trying to calm his rapidly beating heart. “Just got startled, that’s all.”

“It’s eleven at night,” said Laf. “You did not eat your lunch.” They nodded to the sandwich sitting unnoticed next to where Alexander had been working.

“Oh- right, sorry. I was distracted.”

“Or dinner,” added John. “You should eat and go to sleep, Alex. The bathroom is open when you want to change.”

“Right,” said Alexander again. “Um. Thanks.” Herc and Laf nodded and said goodnight, heading into their bedroom. John gave him one last, searching look before doing the same.

Alex ate the sandwich, which tasted as good as Lafayette’s pancakes, and gazed longingly at his laptop before changing into his sleepwear- another hoodie and sweatpants. He climbed into bed and lay on his back, listening to John’s breathing get deeper and easier as he fell asleep.

It always took Alexander an hour or two to relax enough to fall asleep. When he finally did, he dreamed, and not pleasantly. He never did dream pleasantly anymore.

///

When he woke, he found himself lying with his feet where his head should have been, the sheets and blanket twisted around him so tight it felt like he was suffocating. He untangled himself, padding silently across the wood floor to the bathroom and locking the door behind him. Then he leaned over the toilet, where what was left of the sandwich Lafayette had made came up.

After he finished, he leaned against the wall for a few minutes, eyes closed. Every night- why did this have to happen every night? He had his first day of classes tomorrow- and political science, which he was looking forward to immensely.

He pulled himself up with a sigh, downed a glass of water, and went back to bed, hoping against hope he hadn’t woken John.

As he settled into his blanket, he thought he heard something from above him, but if John was awake he didn’t say anything. Alex turned so he was facing the wall, knowing it was pointless to close his eyes. He wouldn’t get any more sleep tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so I lied. I'm excited about this and wanted to post more. Fight me.
> 
> Anyway, I really would love to hear what you think of this! If you like it, tell me! If you hate it, TELL ME! Please! I like feedback a lot. Also I forgot to mention this and I don't think it'll be a problem, but I wanted to say it: I appreciate constructive criticism, but I do not appreciate hate. If you have a problem with me or something I'm writing that is due to your ignorance rather than a mistake I made, don't read it. I have low self-esteem already, guys, I don't need any more negativity in my life. Thanks for coming to my TED talk. If you're still giving this a chance, I love you a lot. Next chapter in the next few days.
> 
> One last thing and then I'll shut up, I promise- do you guys like the chapter length? Would you like them to be longer or shorter?


	3. First Day in a New World

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Hamilsquad has their first day of college classes.

John woke to the steady beeping of Alexander’s alarm clock at seven in the morning. Why so early, he wasn’t sure- their first class didn’t start until nine, and he didn’t need that much time to get ready. He’d just pull on a sweatshirt and brush his teeth, and he’d be decent.

John heard Alex groan softly and roll out of bed after silencing the alarm, but kept his eyes closed. He didn’t need to be up yet- besides, he’d woken up when Alex had gotten out of bed at around two in the morning to go to the bathroom. He dozed in and out for an hour, then got up to shower and get ready.

When he walked into the kitchen, Laf handed him a pinkish smoothie that smelled of strawberries. They had apparently already used their frozen berries to make breakfast for the foursome. John didn’t know how he hadn’t heard the blender- it wasn’t like the apartment had thick walls- but as he took a gulp and flavor exploded on his tongue, he was grateful for both the breakfast and the undisturbed sleep (well, mostly undisturbed). 

John sat beside Hercules at the counter, who was rubbing his eyes blearily and sipping his breakfast. Lafayette was gathering their notebooks and pencils, and Alexander was sitting on the couch with his legs folded under him, typing madly on his laptop.

He was ridiculously adorable, with his nose all scrunched up from concentrating and his hair pulled back messily like that, although he was worryingly skinny and had dark crescents under his eyes. John wondered if that had anything to do with Alex getting up at night. Then John caught himself and turned away. He’d just met Alex- he wasn’t supposed to make John blush this much.

As he turned, John noticed Lafayette staring at him with a knowing little smirk. They walked over and bent near John’s ear, whispering, “He is pretty, yes?”

John blushed. Alex, pretty? He hadn’t thought about it that way, but… it fit. “No,” he muttered. “I just met him, Laf.”

“Oui, of course.” Laf nodded, still wearing that infuriating little smile. “But that does not stop you from thinking it.”

“Well, I don’t know if he thinks the same of me,” John said, studiously avoiding Laf’s eyes.

“You are very red, mon ami,” said Laf with a chuckle. “Just like yesterday when he walked in.”

“Shut it,” said John sharply. Hercules glanced up, taking in John’s red face and the way Lafayette was smirking.

“And you were so charming when you made him pancakes yesterday,” continued Laf. “And when you switched beds-”

“Stop it!” said John, shoving at Laf’s shoulder. Laf let out a giggle and Hercules grinned. “My father already kicked me out of the house for something like this, and what he did to my first boyfriend wasn’t something I’m eager to see again. So stop.”

Laf’s and Herc’s smiles faded.

“I get it, man,” said Hercules. “I do. But really, you should do what’s best for you, y’know? Don’t let him get in the way. He’s not here, he doesn’t need to know.”

“Merde. I do not like that man,” muttered Lafayette.

“What does ‘merde’ mean?” said Hercules.

“Nothing, nothing.” Laf waved a hand airily.

“Right…” said John, staring at Alex again. “We should go to class.”

“We shall let you get ton petit lion,” said Laf, nodding towards Alex with a smirk.

John laughed and walked over to Alexander. “We’ve got to go.”

No response.

“Alex… Alexander. Alex. ALEX.” John put a hand on his shoulder.

Alex jumped to his feet and lifted his arms as if to protect himself, clambering backward until he hit the wall, where he stood, shoulders hunched, hands trembling and breathing heavily.

John’s heart stopped. He knew that expression, knew the fear in Alex’s eyes and the shaking in his fingers. He’d lived through it- maybe not as bad as Alex had, judging by how dramatically he’d reacted, but… enough to know. He swallowed, thinking about a little kid in a sweatshirt much too big for his tiny hunger-panged frame, cowering in front of someone like Henry.

“I’m sorry, Alexander,” he said quietly, mind still reeling. “Are you okay?”

Alex lowered his arms and clenched his fists to prevent the shaking. “Yeah. Yeah, of course, you just startled me. Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize,” said John immediately. “Never apologize for… something like that. My fault. But, um, we have class soon.”

“Oh. Right. Thanks.” Alex swept up his laptop and stuffed it in his battered bag. “What class do you have first?”

“Microeconomics,” groaned John. “I’m bored just thinking about it.”

“Sounds rough,” sympathized Alexander. “I’ve got biology later today, don’t you have that as well?”

“Yeah, so I’ll see you then,” said John, grinning at the thought. 

He and Alex chatted casually until Laf and Herc were ready, then all four took off towards King’s campus, where they went their separate ways: Alexander and Laf to political science, Hercules to an elective fashion design class- the mention of this topic never failed to make Laf and John chuckle- and himself, of course, to microeconomics.

This was, without a doubt, the most tedious fifty minutes of his life. He spent the hour doodling anything that came to his mind in the little sketchbook he’d gotten as a Christmas present from his little sister. It was for less serious drawings, he’d decided- his real sketchbook was safely stowed away in its own pocket of his bag, along with his drawing pencils and supplies.

When the fifty minutes were up, he slung his bag across his shoulder and headed to biology, where Alexander, Laf, and Herc were all waiting for him. They grabbed seats towards the front at John’s urging, and John somehow ended up squished between Lafayette and Alex. 

Every so often while John was busy taking notes, Laf would nudge him in the side and wink, pointing subtly to Alex. John eventually elbowed him back so hard he knocked into Hercules, who was tinkering with a paperclip. Herc shot them both death glares and Laf calmed down a bit, letting John take notes in peace. He snuck glances at Alexander every once in awhile, who had already filled twice the amount of pages John had with meticulous, tidy notes. Compared to John’s mess of descriptive drawings, arrows connecting different ideas, and random phrases, Alex’s notes looked like a beautifully written novel. It made John’s hand cramp just looking at it.

He stared at Alexander, memorizing the way the sunlight hit his face and made his dark circles less prominent, and the intense look of concentration on his face. He’d decided he was going to draw Alex when he looked like this, all serious and immersed in his work. A good drawing, not the little sketches he’d done in microeconomics earlier. Although those had turned out nicely. He was thinking of using them as an outline.

John's mind drifted, thinking back to the incident that morning when he'd made a disastrous attempt to get Alexander's attention. The way Alexander had gotten up in the middle of the night, the things he’d said about getting up often, the fact that John could already tell he was a workaholic and it was literally the first day of classes, his jumpiness and shy nature…

Something was up with Alexander. John had a feeling he knew what it was, and it was worrisome, but he had also just met this guy. He wasn’t about to pry into Alex’s business when he’d only known him for all of a week. Still, if it came up… John liked Alex. He wasn’t going to just do nothing.

But he also had no clue as to what he should do.

“John,” hissed a voice to John’s right. “John, what are you doing?”

John blinked slowly. It was Alexander, glaring at him impatiently. Oh, no. Had John been staring at Alex this entire time? “What?”

“Aren’t you going to take notes? I thought you liked this class.” Alex raised an eyebrow. “And why have you been staring at me for the last ten minutes?”

Oh NO. “I, um… I zoned out. Sorry.” John turned back to Professor Johnson with a grimace, vowing to focus on his notes, and only his notes, for the rest of the class. He would ignore the way the beams of sunlight made Alexander’s skin glow and the way he bit his bottom lip when he was confused about something, and the way he…

Needless to say, it didn’t work out too well. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I lied again. I figured, it isn't that late, and the gods know I'm not going to sleep anyway, so I might as well edit and post another chapter. Get a good start on it, ya know? Sorry it's short.
> 
> If you guys notice Lafayette's pronouns ever being 'he' instead of 'they', please let me know and I'll fix it. When I first began this story, I had Laf as a he, so I might have missed something when I changed the pronouns.
> 
> The next chapter needs a bit more editing than these last three, so I'm probably being truthful when I say it will be a couple of days before I get it up. Probably. Thank you again for reading, it means so much to me!


	4. Fantabulous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lafayette finds a cute coffee shop nearby, which just so happens to be the workplace of a certain Schuyler sister.

That weekend, after an exhausting but successful first week of classes, the group went to a little coffee shop down the road Laf had found for a bite to eat. “I cannot cook for you all the time,” they had said, and the group, begrudgingly, had agreed. It was small and cozy with comfortable booths, a communal bookshelf, and best of all-

“Free wifi!” exclaimed Alexander as he sat down, noticing a sign on the wall. “But only with service.” John smiled to himself as Alex flung the end of his Slytherin scarf over his shoulder and unzipped his bag. It was still September, too early for scarves, but Alex had insisted. “It’s for the aesthetic!” he’d told Herc, who’d shaken his head in disappointment.

“We were planning on buying something anyway, mon petit lion,” said Lafayette, rolling their eyes. John slid into at the chair across from them and Alex, next to Hercules.

“I wish you wouldn’t call me a little lion all the time,” grumbled Alexander. “My hair isn’t that bad, and I am not short enough to be called petit.”

“Besides,” John pointed out, ignoring Alex’s comment, “if you have to buy something first, it’s not actually free wifi.”

“Wifi is wifi, my dear Laurens,” said Alex, opening his computer. John pushed away the fluttering in his stomach and twisted his hoodie strings around his fingers.

At that moment, a waitress came by to take their order. “Hey, I’m Eliza. What can I do for you?” Her dark eyes lingered on Alexander as she hooked one thumb through the belt loop of her skinny jeans, and her lustrous ebony hair contrasted with her pale skin, shimmering like fresh snow. She looked like a doe with her big, innocent eyes.

“I’ll have a cappuccino, s’il vous plait,” said Laf, glancing up at her, then looking to Alexander, who hadn't yet noticed her stare, too busy poking around on his laptop. Which was fine, of course. John didn’t mind. Why would John mind if a pretty girl was staring at Alexander?

He shook his head, drawing himself back into the present, where Eliza had just asked him and Hercules for their orders.

“Same as Laf,” said John and Herc at the same time, then met each other’s eyes and grinned.

“Can I have a large black coffee, please?” said Alex, momentarily glancing up from his computer. As soon as he saw Eliza, she smiled at him and he blushed a deep red. John’s grin slid off his face.

“Sure,” she replied, tossing her hair over her shoulder and giving Alex a flirty wink. “Be right back.” Her eyes didn’t seem so innocent anymore.

Herc’s and Laf’s chatter continued without John as he watched Eliza work. She was gorgeous, he admitted, with her long black hair and graceful movements. Alex was observing her too, ceasing his typing for once, his eyes thoughtful and eager. When she returned with their drinks, her hand brushed Alex’s and he blushed again. John glared at his cappuccino with distaste. He knew he liked guys, he knew he liked Alexander more than what roommates should, and he knew he was going to get hell for it from his father eventually, but he couldn’t help it. Alex was beautiful, witty, and… completely oblivious.

“Look,” said Alexander in an undertone after Eliza left. He tilted his paper cup to show them something written in elegant script on the side, under her name.

“She gave you her number!” exclaimed Lafayette, their brown eyes glittering with excitement. Alex beamed and John scowled. 

“Eliza Schuyler.” Hercules examined the number. “Nice, Alex. I know her little sister Peggy from my fashion design class, she’s great. Super smart, which is why she’s in college early. Well,” he amended, “that and her family is rich as hell.”

“So,” said John, gritting his teeth, “are you gonna text her later?”

“Yeah, I think I will,” said Alex with a smile, flashing his dimples. “She’s really pretty, isn’t she?”

Lafayette smirked. “Oui, she is.”

“And she can’t keep her eyes off you,” said Herc with a grin. John immediately turned to look at her and saw he was right- Eliza was watching Alex hungrily.

John forced himself to nod and smile in agreement, watching in silence as Alex put Eliza Schuyler’s number in his phone. It was probably better that Alex was going after a girl like her instead of John anyway, seeing as what happened with his last boyfriend. Michael had been the polar opposite of Alex- soft-spoken, shy, self-conscious despite being incredibly muscular and handsome. He and John had loved each other, until Henry ruined it all and Michael moved away. But that had all been months ago, and he and Michael had only dated for around three weeks. Besides, Alexander was different.

“Alexander, she is looking at you again,” said Lafayette, gesturing to Eliza.

Alex glanced at her and blushed- again. John glowered at her, but she didn’t notice, too busy waving and winking at Alex. Herc glanced from John to Eliza, raising his eyebrows.

“John. You good?”

Alex and Laf looked at John and he cleared his throat awkwardly and took a gulp of his coffee.

“Oh, sure. I’m fine- great. Wonderful, actually. Yeah.” John forced a smile. “Perfect. Fantabulous.”

Fantabulous?

What. The. Hell.

Herc’s eyebrows rose higher than the Empire State Building, but he said nothing, for which John was grateful. Alex rolled his eyes and looked back at Eliza with a grin as Laf sighed dramatically. John settled into his chair, glaring at his paper cup and brooding.

Michael had been too afraid to step up and voice his opinion. Alexander had been doing that his whole life. John’s relationship with Mike had been centered around protection, not affection- being gay in a conservative city in South Carolina wasn’t easy. They had to stick together. His goal with Alexander was just to be around him, because every time John saw him he could feel his heart rate pick up, and every time Alex grinned at him he felt blood rush to his face, and it was like nothing he’d ever felt before. With Michael, or with anyone. 

So when Alex smiled the little smile John loved so much at Eliza, the one that meant ‘I am happy just being here with you’, it felt like someone was taking John’s heart and twisting it, slowly and torturously, until he felt like he was dying. John hated it.

“John… Earth to John!”

Someone was waving their hand in front of John’s face. He blinked and turned to the hand’s owner- Lafayette.

“Are you ready to go, John?”

“Oh- uh, yeah.” John glanced down at his untouched cappuccino. He stood and grabbed his bag and his coffee, following his friends out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Happy Christmas Eve Eve, if you celebrate it. If you don't, have a great day (...night? Yep, it's midnight where I'm at) anyway! Hope you liked this. I know the chapters are a bit short, so do you want me to make them longer and have a bit more time between updates or is short ok with y'all? I'd love to hear from you.
> 
> Next chapter has a bit of a twist to it, so get ready. Should be fun. It's a bit of an emotional one, so... we'll see how it goes. I'll post a warning before the chapter because it might be a sensitive topic for some people (ik it is for me). 
> 
> By the way, I will be posting warnings before chapters if there's anything that might be triggering or uncomfortable for anyone. In those chapters, I'll also post a short chapter summary at the end for people who may not want to read sensitive content. If I miss something that was sensitive to you, let me know and I'll take it down while apologizing profusely and maybe crying (probably so many times you'll need to ask me to stop apologizing, because I do that a lot).
> 
> Next chapter probably not till a couple days after Christmas unless I really get my act together tomorrow night.


	5. Tear Him Apart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alexander and Hercules notice something is up with John, but Lafayette won't tell them what they know. The foursome has a run-in with an enemy. Hercules is left shaken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, this has been a long time coming. Sorry it's so late.
> 
> This chapter contains some possibly triggering content. It's based on a harrowing experience that has actually happened to me. Possible triggers involve: the "r" word and ableism, as well as some physical fighting. There is a summary of the chapter in the end notes if you'd like to skip it- this was extremely hard for me to write as it's very personal, and I understand others might feel the same.
> 
> Enjoy! Or don't, whichever.

The next week in Biology, Alexander was sitting by John as usual, who kept getting distracted and glaring off into the distance instead of taking the detailed notes he normally did. Alex was a bit concerned, but he didn’t worry too much- he was preoccupied. He’d been texting Eliza all week, and they’d hung out nearly every day at the coffee shop where she worked since they’d first met- sometimes with Alex’s roommates, mostly without. She’d invited him to her apartment after class tomorrow. Alex was nervous- her little sister Peggy roomed with her, unusually smart and advanced for her age. The oldest sister Angelica lived there too, who had an intimidating reputation. She was out of college and searching for a long-term job as a political science major. A girl after his own heart. The three sisters were raised wealthy in the city with their father, a senator. Alex needed to make a good impression- not only because he really liked Eliza, but because her family had excellent connections.

All the same, he tried not to worry too much- he knew he was well-spoken. Eloquent, even. He’d hopefully be able to charm the Schuyler sisters despite his scrappiness.

A nudge to his side made Alex start and glance up. Hercules was poking him, chocolate eyes narrowed.

“What?”

“Have you noticed how weird John’s been acting?” Herc whispered. Alex looked around. John was still staring off into the distance with a foul expression, like the diagrams of cells on the wall had punched his mother. He wasn’t remotely interested in his favorite subject. Alex thought he knew why- he’d seen him watching Eliza at the coffee shop with that jealous grimace.

He turned back to Hercules. “I think he’s got a crush on Eliza,” he hissed.

Herc scoffed and made a face. “Eliza’s not his type. I think it’s something else.”

“Well, you asked me. I gave you my opinion,” whispered Alex irritably. “I don’t have any clue.”

“Any clue about what?” asked Laf curiously from Herc’s other side, leaning forward to meet Alexander’s eyes.

“Why John’s acting weird,” said Herc.

“Oh. Is it not obvious?” said Laf.

“No,” snapped Alex. “It’s not.”

Laf rolled their eyes. “You Americans are very oblivious to love.” They leaned down over their notes, a colossal mess of jumbled French and English thrown together in an order no one but themself would ever understand. They began to jot down more material, studiously ignoring their two friends’ questioning stares.

“What did I tell you?” said Alex, poking Herc’s rather large bicep. “Eliza.”

Hercules shook his head. “I really don’t think-”

“Shut up, will you?” John spoke up suddenly. Alex jumped. “I’m trying to take notes. What are you whispering about anyway?”

“Nothing,” said Alex and Herc together, bending dutifully back over their notes. Alex decided not to mention that John wasn’t actually paying attention to the professor, just staring moodily into the distance. Maybe Alexander would speak to him about it later, ask him why he was upset. John had never acted this… irritable before. He was always steady, calm and patient, an immovable rock in the midst of a roaring river. Yes, Alex vowed, he’d talk to his friend. Find out if something happened to make him act out like this.

///

After class, Alexander and his roommates were drifting across the campus lawn towards their dorm when a loud, nasally voice lingered on the autumn breeze, yanking at their attention.

“I mean, it’s not like retards need special treatment, you know? They don’t need to go to college or anything. They’re still gonna end up cleaning trash off the side of highways. Outcasts, you know? Evolution’s mistakes.”

Alex stiffened and turned around. The speaker was lean and stringy, ranting to a companion who was the exact opposite. The larger one was looking to the speaker like he was some kind of pagan god. Alex wrinkled his nose and glanced sideways to see his friends staring at them as well. As a group, they stepped closer to better hear what Seabury was saying.

“That’s Samuel Seabury,” murmured John in Alexander’s ear. “Son of a local politically influential bishop. My dad knows his dad.” 

“My dad met this girl with Down’s a few days ago,” Seabury continued, curling his lip. “She was so fucked in the head he had to repeat what he asked for fifty times to make her understand what he was saying. Just proves my point, doesn’t it? Retards don’t need education, they don’t need our tax money. It’s not gonna do shit for them, they’re too idiotic.”

Alexander’s blood boiled in his veins, churning and flowing with rage. How moronic could this guy be? 

Someone grabbed his arm. Alex spun, fury clouding his vision. He blinked. Hercules was trembling, eyes sparkling with furious tears. “Tear him apart,” he muttered, squeezing Alex’s arm hard. “Tear him apart, Alexander, because if I go near him I’m going to rip his throat out.”

Alex believed him. He nodded, clapping him on the upper arm for reassurance. Herc jerked his chin in return and released him. Alex stormed toward Seabury, shoving him on the shoulder to get his attention. The boy looked him up and down, lip curling in a self-righteous leer.

“First of all, dumbass,” Alexander began, sneering, “it’s called Down Syndrome, not Down’s. It isn’t his syndrome. Secondly, don’t use that word. ‘Retard’. It’s been twisted around to be incredibly offensive and nasty, and most people don’t think it should be used. If that doesn’t do anything for your nonexistent moral compass, it’s also politically incorrect, so if you’re looking to get hired as a high-up official like your daddy, good luck finding any opportunities with a tongue like that. Third, you’d better watch your fucking mouth, because if you keep talking you’re just going to further embarrass yourself. Honestly, ‘evolution’s mistakes’? Aren’t you the son of a bishop? I thought you didn’t believe in evolution. And even if you did, isn’t your whole thing about God not making any mistakes? Hypocrite,” he spat. “You’re more senseless than you look, and that’s saying something.” Alex looked him up and down, letting a leer of his own cross his face. “If you and a baboon were standing next to each other, the only way people would be able to tell you apart is that the baboon would be better spoken- and better dressed too.”

“And who in the hell are you?” He looked offended, which was ridiculous seeing as he was the one being offending.

“Alexander Hamilton. And I don’t particularly care who you are, except I want your name so I can beat your fucking ass next time I hear you talking that way.”

“Samuel Seabury.” He smirked. “You’re a smartass, aren’t you? Think you can waltz in here and talk to me about beating someone’s ass? You’re what- ninety pounds and four foot seven? You can’t possibly think you can do any kind of damage. Why d’you care, anyway? You don’t seem particularly upset.” Then his eyes fell on Hercules, silent tears falling from his eyes with his fists clenched. “Aw, defending the retards for a friend? How cute. But you’d think they’d send someone more competent, you know? Besides, who even cares whether it’s Down’s or Down? They’re just as retarded no matter how you say it-”

Alexander punched him in the nose as hard as he could, then brought up his knee and shoved it between Seabury’s legs. Seabury yelled and slammed his fist into Alex’s nose with a crunch. He reeled, raising a hand up to his nose, but recovered quickly- until Seabury got him into a chokehold. He spluttered and John shouted and rushed forward, but Alex elbowed Seabury in the stomach and he let go. Alex spun around and started whaling on him, pummeling everywhere he could reach as hard as he could, until someone grabbed his arms and forcefully pulled him away.

He struggled, flailing his arms, and Lafayette shouted in his ear, “Arrête! You got him, mon ami, il est presque mort, leave it!” Alex struggled for a moment longer, then went limp and Laf released him. He straightened up, breathing heavily, and glanced back at Herc, who was being restrained by John and another kid simultaneously, rage twisting his face as angry tears poured down his cheeks.

Seabury was lying on the floor groaning, blood trickling from a cut lip, his face already turning various shades of purple, green, and yellow. Alex smirked down at him, reveling in how the blood from his (probably broken) nose dripped onto the offender’s cheek.

“Don’t ever say that kind of shit again.” Alex spat blood on the floor next to him and walked away, grabbing John’s and Herc’s arms as he went. When they got outside, he pushed Hercules down onto a bench, where Laf sat beside him and John put a hand on his shoulder. Alex crouched in front of him as Herc buried his face in his hands, still crying silently. The kid that had helped restrain him stood silently by John’s side, his dark eyes following Alexander.

“Hercules, mon ami, are you alright?” Laf rested a hand on his knee. 

“No,” he said quietly, rubbing his face. “How the fuck could I be alright right now?”

“Stupid question. Désolé. But what I meant was, is there a personal reason why what that shitbag said that offended you so much?”

He shook his head, voice cracking. “My sister has Down syndrome.”

John squeezed his shoulder. “Hercules, some people have a stick so far up their ass it comes out of their mouth, and sometimes someone just needs to take it out and wallop them with it so hard their dick falls off. Not that it would be that big of a loss for Seabury, his is so small anyway.”

Herc loosed a choked laugh and wiped his eyes. “Alexander is pretty good at that stuff.”

Alex grinned. “You feeling any better?”

“A bit, yeah.”

“You know, I don’t agree with what Seabury said, but it might have been better to let it go. What did beating him up accomplish?” The new kid spoke up. He was black with a bald head and deep, dark, cautious eyes.

“It made us feel better,” stated Alexander solidly, looking up at him. “Who’re you, anyway?”

“Aaron Burr. Senior.”

“And to what do we owe the pleasure of your insightful services today, dear Senior Mr. Burr, sir?” said John mockingly, bowing in Burr’s direction.

“I’m just applying common sense,” said Burr, rolling his eyes. “Beating the shit out of Seabury may have made you feel better, but it didn’t change his opinion.”

“Yeah, but he still needed a good old whack on the head, don’t you think? Or are you saying he was in the right here?” Alexander crossed his arms over his chest.

“I’m saying a ‘whack on the head,’ as you so eloquently put it, won’t change his opinion.”

“Stop dancing in circles and give us a straight answer,” said Herc with a scowl. “You think he was right?”

“No, I think he’s an idiot. But I also think his ableist opinions have not changed since you beat him up.” Burr sighed. “I’ve got to go. Try not to get in more fights that won’t change anything, alright?”

“I don’t make promises I can’t keep,” said Alexander brightly. “See ya, Burr.”

Burr waved and strode across the lawn. John scowled after him.

“Bit full of himself, isn’t he?”

“He isn’t that bad,” said Alex, rolling his eyes. “Just afraid to take a stand.”

“You can’t win the game if you don’t play in the game,” John pointed out. “He’ll never get anything done without taking a stand.”

“His loss.” Alexander pulled Herc to his feet. “Let’s go home, yeah?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Summary:
> 
> Alexander notices John being distant, not paying attention in class, etc and asks Hercules about it. Herc has no clue, but Laf seems to know something. Neither of the boys can get them to spill. Alex thinks maybe John likes Eliza and is jealous of him.
> 
> On their way back to their dorm, they run into Samuel Seabury, who is ranting about how useless people with disabilities are. Herc is extrememly effected and asks Alexander to "tear him apart". Alex steps in- first with words, then with fists. Herc tries to join in, but Aaron Burr helps John and Laf pull the boys apart. Hercules shares that his sister has Down syndrome, and the other three help him feel better. Aaron Burr states that physically attacking Seabury hadn't done anything to change his ableist views. 
> 
> ///
> 
> As I stated, this is based on my own experiences and is very close to my heart. I know Herc doesn't have a sis with DS, but sometimes I feel the need to get that perspective out into the world, even if it's only through fanfiction. Thanks for reading.


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